Love Is Blurry?

A statement from a not-so-savory cast member on season 2 of Love is Blind

When Season 2 of Love is Blind premiered on February 11th of 2022, fans of the show shrieked with joy after waiting almost two years since the show premiered in 2020. Season 1 premiered at the height of the Pandemic. The world stopped because of a deadly virus, and many of us stayed at home. Season 1 brought your typical reality TV show drama and a beautiful love story that warmed the viewers’ hearts with now power couple Lauren Speed-Hamilton and Cameron Hamilton.

However, after the long wait for season 2, many fans left disappointed. The drama ramped up significantly, and the love went sour. Out of all the engaged couples that made it to the altar, only two are still married and even the two married couples were hard to root for. I saw the potential of some couples but that went away as the episodes continued on. To sum up the season in one word, it would be misdirected. Let’s break down the couples of the season:

Danielle and Nick wearing a blue dress and blue suit. They are both caucasian.
Source: Netflix Love is Blind

Danielle and Nick
The biggest misdirect of the season for me. I really thought they were the next Lauren and Cameron of this season and BOY was I wrong. Danielle talked about her insecurities about her appearance with Nick since she lost a lot of weight, and Nick seemed open to accepting her for who she is. He expressed his struggles with sharing his feelings with others and not having that reciprocated back to him. They started talking about how their lives would work together and it was cute! 
Until it wasn’t…
Danielle never stopped talking about her insecurities and proceeded to gaslight Nick in every conversation they had. She would always find a way to argue and nitpick every word he said. She even called him a narcissist! Why Nick continued to be with her and marry her makes absolutely no sense to me. He seemed miserable on his wedding day–– sweating like a criminal in an interrogation room. His own family did not support the wedding. They genuinely seemed to want the worst for him. I’m hyperventilating just thinking about this couple.

This is Natalie and Shayne posing in front of the beach. She has a read swimsuit and he is wearing a white shirt with blue striped shorts.
Source: Natalie’s instagram

Shayne and Natalie
What in God’s green earth did Natalie see in Shayne? Girl…Natalie, you were blind to the red flags because everyone watching could see that Shayne was not it. Natalie seemed emotionally and financially stable and said she wanted to have a relationship like her parents and grandparents. That was your first mistake, Natalie, because every relationship is unique. That does not mean you had to couple up with Shayne. 
Ya’ll Shayne must have been on something because he was always hyper, never sitting still, his eyes were wide, and he had the voice of a frat boy that never grew up. His conversations seemed shallow, and he kept begging for compliments from her. He also connected with another woman named Shaina *eye roll* who only had conversations with each other about crop tops and hooking up. 
Natalie kept saying Shayne has a funny, bright, and extroverted personality which is great and all but he’s not mature. I often felt that Natalie tried to be a “cool girl” to appeal to Shayne’s immature and erratic behavior. He’s horrible at handling conflict because every conversation they had, he gaslighted her and made it about him. Blaming her for not complimenting him enough and being mean to her. She was matching your immature behavior, Shayne!

Shaina and Kyle are in her house sitting down. He is wearing a beige shirt with buttons and she is wearing a tan turtleneck shirt. They are both caucasian.
Source: Netflix Love is Blind

Shaina and Kyle
This girl either needs glasses or needs to lay off the botox because it’s seriously affecting her vision. Literally, every time she wants to shade someone, she squints, and her lips purse up like a duck. It’s not giving what you think it’s giving Shaina. Anyway, she’s a part of this weird love square between her pining for Shayne while accepting Kyle’s –– who’s pining for her love –– proposal. I think Shaina wanted to stay on the show longer just so she could steal Shayne away from Natalie. He would have been better with Shaina anyway because they’re both toxic and vain. 
Now, Kyle, I didn’t like from the jump because he kept trying to portray this “I’m not a part of the system” person. He always seemed very preachy and judgmental to me. He constantly stressed how he was a man of the people because he worked in construction. Yeah right, dude. He and Shaina’s conversation started with their similarities in being working-class people and liking sports and what not until it got to religion. 
Shaina said she wanted a “godly-man who would lead her” and that she is a devout Christian. Kyle said he grew up in a Catholic home but is now an atheist. Shaina went in full attack mode after that and even said she doesn’t believe in evolution. WTF? I shouldn’t be too surprised because Shaina gave me fake Christian Trump vibes anyway. Their conversation about religion should have stopped Kyle from proposing but clearly he’s blind because he did just that. When they saw each other face-to-face, I could see Shaina has not attracted to this man at all but Kyle said they could make it work. 
Big mistake dude. 
Shaina dumps him during their honeymoon and Kyle still pursues her.

Iyanna and Jarrette wearing matching red outfits. A dress and a suit. They are both black people.
Source: Netflix Love is Blind

Iyanna and Jarrette
Iyanna seems like a sweet girl with a good head on her shoulders considering what she’s been through. I thought she and Jarrette had a good connection but that was another misdirect. They seemed to understand each other and talked about their future, but who did Jarrette want to propose to? Mallory is another girl in the pods and a part of the second love square this season. 
Jarrette disrespected Iyanna so many times and does not seem ready for marriage even though he and Iyanna are still married to this day. Like dude is a bum. He’s a hustler and has many “jobs” but that screams unstable. He barely has a bed in his apartment and keeps gifts that his exes have given him. He goes out to party with his lame friends way past 3am and dared to get annoyed when Iyanna asked him to not come home late. 
I firmly believe that who you surround yourself with influences the way you act, think, and speak. Jarrette’s friends are party boys and are not settled or secure in themselves. If he doesn’t distance himself away from those guys, his marriage to Iyanna will suffer. Iyanna had so many doubts about his commitment to her and she should have listened to her intuition. He literally proposed to her only because Mallory turned down his proposal in the pods. 
You don’t deserve to be someone’s second choice girl!

Mallory and Salvador are sitting down on chairs on their wedding day. She is wearing a white dress and he is wearing a black suit. They are both hispanic.
Source: Netflix Love is Blind

Mallory and Salvador
A cute couple that quickly became an annoying snoozefest in the end. I thought Mallory was a nice girl until she meets up with Jarrette during the honeymoon trip and said she’s a “guy’s girl.” Mallory, being a “guy’s girl” never works out for any woman. They will friend zone you and never see you as a romantic prospect. You being “not like other girls” does not put you in a higher position when dealing with men. 
I thought she and Sal were cute together. They have a shared cultural background and desire to be loved by someone who will put in the effort. Sal said he’s a sensitive soul and really in tune with his emotions. Mallory seemed to be open to that, but nope. She wanted a manly man with who she could watch sports. 
Sal would make these cute songs for her and take her on romantic dates and she would cringe every time. She also admitted she wasn’t attracted to him but never to his face. She gave him nothing in return. No romantic acts of love, no emotional vulnerability, no passion. Absolutely nothing. In the end, at the altar, Sal says no to Mallory. I’m glad he did because she does not know what she wants in a relationship yet and needs to take time to figure that out.

The Reunion episode
Shake wants his 15 minutes of fame and I’m glad the season is over. Shake never apologized for his horrible behavior towards Deepti and seemed genuinely clueless about his actions. I left the reunion feeling not fulfilled with the conclusions of the couples’ relationships. They should have shown all the toxic arguments between Danielle and Nick and when Shaina disrespected the f*ck outta Natalie by calling Shayne and Natalie’s relationship fake. 

Thank God this season is over though. The producers owes everyone who watched this season a refund. Love is Blind is renewed for season 3 and I hope the producers are listening. We want a love story to root for and cast members who are not toxic.
Thanks for coming to my TED Talk. Mic drop!

A Late 2021 Announcement

Ya girl got a job!

That’s it. That’s the announcement.

Okay…🙄, there’s more. Getting a job this year was something I prayed for, cried for and longed for. It was painful seeing people I graduated with, interned with getting jobs in the same field I studied for. I I constantly second-guessed myself and became very detached, resentful and hopeless.

Though God had a plan for me. He wanted to move me completely from my situation, which is why he didn’t let those jobs I applied to manifest. He saw beyond my perception, but saw my agony — even when I believed he ignored me. He saw something better for me.

I’m not perfect when it comes to faith — secular and spiritual — I constantly give up. But, I’m still here. The breakthrough I needed was more than I imagined.

So yes, ya girl got a job. Ya girl is grateful. Ya girl is trying and she’s looking forward to 2022. 🍾

2022 better be on it’s best behavior…

To Chase or Not Chase a Man: Dating Rules for Black Women

Where does the line blur?

While browsing through YouTube this week, I came across a few videos that talked about actor Joshua Jackson’s comments on his marriage to actress Jodie Turner-Smith. According to entertainment news outlets, Jackson shared that Turner-Smith proposed to him and was “adamant” about it. The bloggers accused him of shaming her dignity by letting this secret out. Jackson is white and Turner-Smith is black.

Many women in the comments section seemed to agree that a woman should not propose to a man nor chase him. They also agreed that what Jackson did was wrong, even spiteful, by airing his relationship dynamic with Jodie seemingly unprovoked. A few amount of women in the comments did not see anything wrong with what Jackson said and believed people were reading too much into his comments.

From YouTuber Paris Milan

I watched the interview and did not find anything wrong with what he said. He told the truth about how they got married and he did not sound malicious to me at all. Jimmy Fallon asked him how he knew she was the one and he replied that she proposed to him and was direct about it. He then followed up, saying that it was the “best decision I ever made.”

I found myself agreeing and disagreeing with the points raised in the videos about Jackson’s comments. However, I ultimately came to the conclusion that dating sucks and it sucks even harder for black women. According to reports from dating apps, black women are the least desired by men of all races, including their own. In media, black women are portrayed from mammies to jezebels. Then there’s colorism, which pits black women against each other all because of the shade of their skin.

As a young, black woman, navigating the dating world constantly leaves me both afraid to find love and wanting to explore it –– especially in interactions with non-black men. I am proud of my skin tone, 4C hair, and African heritage. Yet, I oftentimes feel insecure about myself when surrounded by my white/non-black peers or even fellow black women who are flawless.

In college, I was in two interracial relationships and never quite felt at ease. I had pursued both guys and in the midst of an argument, I was reminded by both guys that I chased them. They both tried to soften the blow and said it was “brave of me” to do that and they admired me for it, but I felt humiliated. I had and still haven’t been chased by a man who took an interest in me and feel that maybe I’m not good enough.

In this new feminist movement of women taking control and going after what they want, I’m constantly torn on how to approach the dating scene as a black woman. Should you show your feelings to your crush or play hard to get? If you do, does that make you desperate? If you don’t, does that make you difficult? I don’t get it. It’s even harder when you’re dating a person of a different race/cultural background than you.

I don’t think black women will ever have the right answers about dating and relationships, but the conversations will continue. We have so much to offer and deserve so much love, regardless of the unwritten rules.

“Tea”🫖 or Mental Health?

I’m choosing the latter.

I started my website primarily to showcase all my professional work and experience in the media field. Eventually, it turned into a blogging website as well. My blog, “Tama’s Two Cents,” allows me to give my own opinions on whatever I seem interested in what’s trending on social media. Yet, lately, I’ve got nothing. Yes, nothing. I just don’t have the desire to scroll on social media for hours on end while comparing myself from afar or hearing about a tragic or sensationalized story one after another.

For the past two months now, I’ve rarely posted or liked content on my Instagram and Twitter pages. I deleted the Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn apps (yes, LinkedIn is a social media site) from my phone, respectively. I still have my YouTube app, where I watch videos that I subscribe to. But even on YouTube, I try to stray away from any videos that will upset me –– news, politics. I don’t have the Facebook app on my phone, but I’ll sign in mostly to look at notifications from Facebook groups that I’m a part of.

Receiving a lot of information across multiple mediums can be overwhelming. There’s too much information out there, and most of the time, the topics are wrong or heavily exaggerated. I’ve noticed that since limiting my time on social media, especially Instagram and Twitter, I’ve felt better. I’m not constantly comparing myself to how someone seems to be “living the good life” on Instagram or LinkedIn or digesting outrage from whatever sensationalist topic is trending on Twitter.

Since limiting my time on social media, I’ve realized that I don’t care about half of the trending topics on the news or social media. I’m learning to filter out things that make me upset, even if it’s a human rights issue (and I’m very passionate about human rights). Life is too short to dwell on things that don’t make you happy.

10 English Actors that currently have Me swooning with Love

I just finished watching the Netflix series “Shadow and Bone” and it was thrilling! The show starts off slow but gradually gets more interesting and exciting. Apparently, the show is based on a popular YA Fantasy book series of the same name. When I was younger, I used to read lots of books from that same genre, including Twilight (yes, THAT one) and Fairest (the same author who wrote Ella Enchanted). But my main reason for tuning into this show was for none other than the beautiful, talented man himself –– Ben Barnes.

Ben Barnes as the Darkling in Shadow and Bone

This man plays the main antagonist General Kirigan, a.k.a. The Darkling. He is power-hungry and misguided in his anger, but also devastatingly handsome. I fell for his charms just like Alina did. I mean…who wouldn’t? Especially if it’s BEN BARNES playing that character. Our Narnia boy is back!

Seeing Ben Barnes on my screen had me reminiscing of other English actors that have blessed us with their presence. Their accents combined with their charmingly good-looks keep us locked in. Here are 10 English actors that have blessed me with their presence:

  1. Henry Cavill
Henry Cavill

2. Regè–Jean Page

Rege Jean-Page

3. Daniel Kaluuya

Daniel Kaluuya

4. Harrison Osterfield

Harrison Osterfield

5. Idris Elba

Idris Elba

6. Alfred Enoch

Alfred Enoch

7. Robert Pattinson

Robert Pattinson

8. Alex Pettyfer

Alex Pettyfer

9. Clive Owen

Clive Owen

10. Tom Holland

Tom Holland

March Sadness, April Pain.

The gun violence pandemic returns in America.
Mykal McEldowney/Indy Star

Kenosha, Wisconsin.

Atlanta, Georgia.

Indianapolis, Indiana.

Austin, Texas.

Brooklyn Center, Minnesota.

Windsor, Virginia.

Chicago, Illinois.

In one month, we have seen multiple incidents of mass shootings and police murders against unarmed black men. It seems like every day, lives are taken in such a graphic and violent way. Every time these incidents happen, protestors demand gun control and defunding the police. Media outlets will report the stories about the shootings (in the case of police murders, some focus on the riots) as a novel event. The words “thoughts and prayers” are recycled by politicians in D.C., yet nothing is done to strengthen gun control, background checks and end qualified immunity. It’s a cycle of death, protests, words and indifference.

When I see incidents like this, two things come to mind: 1. How can anyone not want to prevent tragedies like this from happening? 2. This is embarrassing. Even President Biden said in his press briefings that these incidents are a “national embarrassment.”

My tweets often say that these incidents DO NOT reflect the behavior of an exceptional country. But after some thought…they do! These incidents are uniquely American. The obsession with gun rights, institutional racism and nationalist ideologies all work together to create the mess we have today. America IS exceptional at that.

With the influence of politicians, media and elitists, they have shifted the conversation away from any legislation or idea that is progressive. I don’t mean “progressive” in the political sense, but “progressive” in the moral sense. We are the only country that demonizes gun control, racial equity, class equity, climate change and other social issues. These influences reshape the debate as anti-American if one believes in progressivism –– “us” versus “them.” I see this rising with far-right, nationalist extremist groups and political figures that serve in Congress.

The mental gymnastics and willful ignorance to the mass shootings and police murders of black people are upsetting. We have become indifferent to trauma, because trauma is normalized. Are we not tired of seeing violent death? Are we not tired of seeing families devastated by these killings? Are we not tired of “thoughts and prayers?”

Apparently not and that is troubling.

Labeling the Pandemic

11 months have passed since the pandemic shut down the world and changed our lives forever. We cleared out the toilet paper aisle. We cleared out the Lysol aisle. We mass produced face masks. We started working from home. We limited our contact with our friends and family to be safe.

With social gatherings limited and most of us at home, we had to get creative. So we made Tik Toks, we watched Tiger King and Love is Blind on Netflix, we made banana bread and protested against police brutality in the summer. We will forever refer to this moment in history. The story we will tell our children will have so many side stories.

Here are a couple words people said to describe that moment in 2020:

  1. COVID-19
  2. Coronavirus
  3. Covid
  4. Pandemic
  5. The ‘Rona
  6. Pandemonium
  7. These Corona Streets (my own invention)
  8. The Panoramic

Should Aaron Rodgers Retire?

Morry Gash / AP

No he should not!

If you know me, you know I am a diehard NY Giants fan. The Giants have upset me every year since 2012…the last time they won a Super Bowl. We had a great, but flawed quarterback that was with us for 16 seasons. Now we have a young quarterback who is left with a shitty O-line, terrible coach and bad management.

But enough about my Giants. Let’s talk about my second favorite person in the NFL –– Aaron “Hail Mary” Rodgers. When it’s crunch time and he needs to get that ball to a receiver, he will launch that football so far out of his hands, that it soars through the air and into the end zone.

Last Sunday, at the NFC Championship game, Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers faced Tom Brady and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Two number 12’s battling for a spot in the Super Bowl. I hate Brady and I love Rodgers, so of course I rooted for the Packers. The game went like this: the Buccaneers defensive line was strong and the Packers offensive line was weak. When the Packers defense would make good defensive plays [ i.e. making Tom Brady throw three interceptions], the offense would miss easy passes and couldn’t run the ball through the Buccaneers defensive line. Meanwhile, Brady’s receivers were missing passes in the first half of the game, but the offensive line protected him in the pocket.

The saying in sports goes: “offense wins games defense wins championships.” This worked in the Buccaneers favor and they are now headed to the Super Bowl 😒.

I felt bad for Rodgers, because this was his second shot in about a decade to win another Super Bowl ring. He has the talent, but the Packers organization –– much like the Giants –– keep failing their veteran QBs. The Packers apparently drafted a first-round QB instead of giving Rodgers better players that build the O-line and protect him in the pocket. He deserves better! He deserves another shot at the Super Bowl and a team that’ll invest in him.

Tom Brady was a New England Patriot for 20 years. He has six Super Bowl rings with them. When they lost in the first round of the playoffs last year, you could see the disappointment on his face. By April, we learned that he opted out of his contract and was searching for another team. He landed a spot on the Buccaneers and has since turned that organization around. They gave him a solid team in return. One year later and he’s back to the Super Bowl.

Rodgers is 37 and Brady is 43. Most people would say football athletes at those ages should retire. Yet that didn’t stop Brady and it shouldn’t stop Rodgers.

I hope he returns for another season and continues his 4-year-contract with the Packers. Actually, I hope he decides to do what Brady did and demand a trade! He’s a Hall of Famer and one of the best QBs to ever do it!

In Rodgers we trust. 🙏🏾

“This is not who we are,” says Americans after the riot at the Capitol

Lev Radin / Pacific Press / LightRocket via Getty Images

Jan. 14, 2021

WASHINGTON –– This was the phrase many journalists, politicians and citizens said after Trump supporters broke into the Capitol last Tuesday.

“It’s surreal, it feels like I’m talking to a correspondent reporting from Bogota,” said Jake Tapper, a CNN anchor.

“The scenes of chaos of the Capitol do not reflect a true America, do not represent who we are,” said President-elect Joe Biden.

“There is nothing patriotic about what is occurring on Capitol Hill. This is 3rd world style anti-American Anarchy,” said Sen. Marco Rubio.

These statements ignore the truth of America’s history. We are a nation built from wars, riots, slavery and occupation. Saying these things reinforces the belief that insurrections only happen in “third-world countries.” In fact, these statements are imperialist and erase the numerous coups America has inflicted on said countries. The riot at the Capitol reaffirmed that this is who we are.

Last Tuesday morning, Trump spoke to his supporters saying, “…you have to get your people to fight and if they don’t fight we have to primary the hell out of the ones who don’t fight. We’re gonna let you know who they are –– I can already tell you though frankly…” This speech targeted Republicans who he “helped get elected,” Democrats, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and even his own Vice President, Mike Pence.

Trump praised Sen. Ted Cruz and Congressman Jim Jordan for siding with him in delaying the certification of the electoral college results. In fact, Cruz specifically said he would want a 10-day audit of the electoral college results before making any final decision. Both Cruz and Jordan joined Trump to push false allegations of election fraud.

Both the speech and Trump’s allies in congress incited the riots. He may not have explicitly told his supporters to destroy the Capitol and hurt law enforcement, but he did imply it. Some legal scholars say his speech was not protected by the first amendment because of incitement but others say it was and cited the Supreme Court case Brandenburg v. Ohio (1969).

Trump has used these dog whistles to rile his base. From calling Mexicans “rapists” to saying “very fine people on both sides” in response to the white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Virginia.

Since the riot at the Capitol, five people were killed including a Capitol police officer. Many social media companies banned Trump from using their platforms, including his favorite one –– Twitter.

Yesterday, the U.S. House of Representatives voted to impeach Trump for the second time. Before the impeachment proceedings, Trump walked back his words by calling for “peace” and “no violence.” He is the first president of the United States to be impeached twice.

Op-Ed by Tama Moni

A Most Unholy Ending to Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

Source: Netflix

Marking the end of 2020, the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina premiered its fourth and final season. After Netflix announced its cancellation, fans were very much disappointed. That left the show runners no time to properly end the storylines. A rushed ending usually does not help the show.

Season four continued with Sabrina Spellman and Sabrina Morningstar living their lives as teenage witch and Queen of Hell. Ambrose warned Spellman that she should never contact her Morningstar half, because it would affect the timeline. We see Morningstar enjoying ruling hell, connecting with her father Lucifer and marry her lover Caliban. Spellman, instead feels empty and lonely as everyone around her seems to be moving on in life. Her ex-boyfriend Nick dates Prudence, Roz and Harvey and Theo and Robin are booed up and Aunt Hilda weds Dr. Cee.

The void Spellman feels ties in to the main plot of the show –– when exiled former high priest Faustus Blackwood releases the Eldrich Terrors. These are the universe’s worst forms of evil: perversion, weirdness, darkness, resurrection, endlessness and the Void. Spellman and her crew defeat all of the terrors except the Void. It represents hollowness and nothingness and I think the writers did a great job using it as a metaphor in describing Spellman’s emotions. But, from episode six to the end of the series the plot gets sloppy.

Spellman and Morningstar are told by the celestial angel Metatron that they must merge together in order to stop the other realms from colliding with one another (it doesn’t happen). Then Spellman takes Nick back, just as she finally moves on with her life. Mambo Marie, the voodoo priestess that Aunt Zelda falls for, is really a voodoo master of the dead and leaves to guard them. Randomly, the writers tell us that Roz is a witch and comes from a long line of psychic witches. Ending the season –– the crew defeats Blackwood, the Void is destroyed, Greendale is safe, but Spellman and Morningstar die. *SPOILERS* They die because the Void is inside Spellman and in order to save the town, she had to be cut open. Lilith gets revenge on Lucifer by killing him and taking his celestial power, thus ruling hell. Nick kills himself to be with Spellman in the afterlife.

Then that’s it. The story just ends. We don’t know what happens to The Academy. We don’t see if Prudence and Ambrose repair their relationship. Does Roz become the “new Sabrina” in her group because she’s a witch now? Why didn’t Lilith reveal herself at the funeral? What will happen to Aunt Hilda and Aunt Zelda’s family mortuary? Do Roz, Harvey and Theo graduate high school? There’s too many plot holes.

I wish Netflix had allowed them to do a season five so we could get answers to those questions. I also wish they hadn’t killed off Sabrina because it made no sense. Nevertheless, great cast and I hope they all rise in their careers after this. Especially Ambrose (played by Chance Perdomo). He’s cute, young and talented.

So did you watch the latest season of CAOS? Do you agree with my analysis? Let me know what you think in the comments below.